I had an epiphany recently. I realised that I get in my own way A LOT when creating. I have lots of creative ideas but before I can even get them out of my head and into the world I stymie myself with expectations of perfection, concerns that it won't turn out as I see it in my mind, it'll be too hard to achieve, that it won't be as good as the work of others, and on, and on..... Phew!
As is the way with realisations, the Universe then began providing me with answers. I received an end-of-year-blog-post-roundup-email from Stampington & Company which pointed me in the direction of Visual Journal Artist, Teesha Moore. And, more specifically, her videos (1 and 2) on the lettering process she uses in her art journals. Whilst watching, I had this HUGE moment; a connection to myself as a teenager.... I used to do this! I used to make cards using lettering like this. I used to know how to do this!
In an instant I was reconnected with a creative part of myself that I had completely forgotten.
So, I watched all of the videos she has so generously created. They start with making your own visual journal out of one big sheet of watercolour paper, through to creating the background, collage, altering, embellishing, drawing and lettering.
There were a couple of things that I really liked about her process that especially resonated with me...
1. if she doesn't completely hate it, she will add an element to her page, whether it's collage, embellishing, drawing... whatever
2. in the end, if she doesn't like it (which she often finds that she does), she just changes it
As a perfectionist in reform, this was a revelation!
So, I went out and bought myself a few supplies, made myself a journal using her instructions (the sheet of watercolour paper cost less than $5) and got to work!
As a first try, I'm pretty happy with the results and am encouraged to try again. And I'm confident that with time and practice, my pages might actually approach some of the fabulous brilliance of Teeasha Moore's journal pages. And I have to remind myself that Teesha has been doing this for many years and for me, "It's just a beginning!", as Amanda Soule of SouleMama so eloquently put it in a recent blog post.
Amanda's blog post also came along at just the perfect time. As a fellow Virgo, I can relate to the desire for something to turn out just as you see it in your mind; a need for perfection. It is all too easy to have high expectations of ourselves but this often squanders and squashes the creative process. And her words she spoke to herself were a balm for me too, "I realized that I could use a little empathy of my own, a little bit of patience, a little bit more gentleness with my own process." Yes.
So, I'm being more gentle with myself. Playing. Just trying things out. After all, it doesn't have to be perfect. It's ok to make mistakes. If it's not what I want I can just change it.
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